so basically lately it seems like no one is happy. everyone is just doing what they can to get by. june 4th is going to be the happiest day of my life. i'll be even happier when i finally move out of this stupid place and be on my own. i'm such a fuckup. i'm just gonna lay low the rest of senior year and tryyyyy to have fun. my life has been a series of awkward events lately. srsly though people have been sipping way too much haterade lately.

i'm really proud of myself this week. i went to the gym 5 days this week annnnd did all my homework and only went to taco bell once haha. i just got back from the gym and i am really tired. i skipped the abs today cause i was too tired buuuut right when i was about to leave the hot guy that me and erin stalk at the gym walked in and of course my jaw dropped like it always does cause he is so freaking hot. so i stayed for like 5 more minutes and just watched him haha. last night was fun. me and lanester went to see step up 2 and it was a really fun movie. the acting wasnt super but the dancing was really awesome. there were about 34592 twelve year olds in the theatre but they werent obnoxious during the movie. afterwards we just got starbucks and then we raced on york road and i thought i was gonna die haha. i tried to watch saw 4 last night but it was so disgusting i couldnt do it. i think im gonna try again cause dinners not for another hour or so...or i could shower. no plans for tonight yet but who knows. off school tomorrow and then retreat wednesday-friday. should be a good week!

Current Music: and the sun will set for you

so school was worthless this week. we had off 2 days for "snow" which was pretty sweet. last night was pretty fun though. stevie had a party so me delaney veronica emily lindsay and pooja went. of course there was a bon fire and of course some asshole almost started a forest fire. but we just hung out and drank beers and rocked out to jonas brothers. it was good times. i had taco bell last night for the first time in forever and it was delicious but i cant have it for awhile now. me and delaney didnt get home until 1 and i thought my mom was gonna kill me but of course she fell asleep on the couch waiting for me to get home lol. we watched good luck chuck...twice and chugged green tea at 4am while my dogs fought over a bone. good times. noooow were just watching hannah montana and im about to go eat breaky. no plans really for today. grocery store, nap, maybe gym? idk im pretty tired. oh and i got into roanoke :) i'm 5 for 5 with college so far im just waiting on 2 more letters from depaul and drexel. i reeeeeeeeally hope i get into depaul im SO nervous. wish me luuuuck!

Current Music: jobros of course

i havent updated in quite some time probably because i just dont care. primary was today. i didn't vote but i am definitely gonna vote in november but right now it's looking like barack is gonna win for the democrats which is great because that's who i would have voted for buuuut part of me was kind of hoping it was gonna be hillary. a lot of people hate her but really can't back up why they hate her and it bugs me. let's be honest...anyone other than george bush has to be an improvement, right? although i seriously dislike mccain. i would just like to see something new. anyyyyyway on another note, i'm really trying to get my grades up. i got scholarships to duquesne and lynchburg and would like to prove to myself that i'm not going to fail out of college in my first semester. i'm terrified of that.



we had a "snow day" today. raaaandom. it's super icy out tonight though so maybe we can get another one tomorrow. that would just be amazzzing because then my bio test would probably not be on friday but who knows. i've been going to the gym a lot lately and my muscles are just so sore haha. i'm gonna take a break this weekend though. if we have off tomorrow i wanna do something fun. i've been working so hard lately, i just hope it pays off.

Current Music: hey brittany!

so i am dunzo with exams. i studied really hard this year so i hope they pay off. now i have a 4 day weekend that should be relatively stress free for once. my psych exam was 25 pages so that was exciting. i think i did pretty good though. i don't have much to update on really. oh! i got into a couple colleges...frostburg and lynchburg. they aren't really my top choices but hey at least i got in somewhere. i'm still waiting on the other SIX schools. ugh this is torture i just want it to be june 4th already. of course there's drama with senior week. i wish people would just chill out and go with the flow. not everything needs to be a drama-fest. i love snow! i'm gonna go drink hot cocoa and watch the real world :):):)

Current Music: taylor swift of course

i. hate. school. i cannot do well in bio 2, it's just impossible. i hate crying in school which i did today and i hate basically everyone. exams are next week. i'm gonna fail bio...no doubt. tomorrow i am spending the day studying with delaney and leah for espanol and bio somewhat. i'm not gonna go out this weekend cause i need need need to pass my exams. 4 day weekend next weekend and i plan on spending every moment of it drinking. oh and my birthday is almost heeeeeere =]

Current Music: halifax-straight up

so i struggled with coming up with a reasonable resolution this year. sure, there are plenty things i want to change, but i know i won't so what's the point in setting myself up for disappointment? i think the most reasonable one is just to do things that make ME happy. i don't want to look selfish but i am just so tired of always being so depressed because i'm trying to make everyone else happy. that probably sounds bad, i know. i just need to enjoy my senior year. i mean this is our year. i'm turning 18 in less than a month. i'm graduating from highschool in 6 months. i'm going to college in 8 months. it's all happening and i just want to enjoy it.

Current Music: remember to feel real.

so christmas was goooood. santa gave me a bunch of new clothes and stuff and a pair of uggs so that made me happy. christmas was at my aunts house this year and that was fun. the food was very delish and i got some cool gifts. my aunt chris thinks i'm like 6 cause i get the most ridiculous gifts every year haha. this year i got a hello kitty purple bathrobe. it's pretty awesome. hung out with amanda a couple nights ago. that was fuuun. we saw juno and it was really cute and made me cry of course. went to the mall with her kiir and stephen and it kinda felt like old times but still not the same as last year. gahh last year was so much fun. i really miss it sometimes especially when i hang out with amanda. we visted stephen lutz at work and i miss hanging out with him too. i also really miss the core 4 from last year. getting drunk and going to shows used to be so much fun...so yeah i think i'm allowed out for new years eve which is good cause i'm ready to get drunk and blackout. that's how i wanna bring in the new year haha. as far as resolutions go...i don't have any yet. i usually make them and then forget what they were, but i think this year i'll take it srsly.

Current Music: saosin

so i really haven't updated in awhile because there hasn't been alot to update on. schools out, thank god. of course i'm grounded for the rest of break. ugh i never ever get grounded and this is like the one week i do not need to be grounded during. oh well. christmas is in 2 days! WHOA! i can't even believe it. i know a couple of the gifts i'm getting because i picked them out but i am really hoping i get a pair of uggs. so yeah my break is going to suck except christmas day because basically all of my friends are grounded, as am i. so don't count on any updates.

Current Music: hannah montana of course

alright so lets start with sunday....around 3 i went to the verizon store to get a new phone. took TWO hours for them to finally give me one. fucking assholes. didnt get to kiirs til like 5 which was dumb. made my shirt for brand new =] and then off we went! we ate pizza on the way and its very difficult to eat and drive. and it was raining pretty hard. so we finally get there and we go in and the first two bands play. they fucking sucked. thrice and me without you...idk. they were baaad. me and amanda saw someone we both love and of course probly looked like idiots haha. so we go down on the floor during thrice's like 3rd to last song. we just stood there and acted like assholes of course. finally they stop playing and we push our way in the middle. of course we are surrounded by sweaty weird dirty guys. and alison is so short she couldnt see anything haha. so FINALLY jesse comes out and starts playing play crack the sky. oooh my god i died. i started crying of course haha. its one of my favorite brand new songs...along with every other song they played haha. so they did a bunch of acoustic songs first and it was really cute. OMG it was so much fun when they played sic transit gloria and tommy gun. so they played a pretty good set. they didnt play quiet things or anything from your favorite weapon but thats okay. after the show it was POURING down rain. so we walk to the car and i drop alison and kiir and amanda off at kiirs house and then drive home. i thought i was going to die but i really didnt care because i was so happy haha. school this week was HORRIBLE. i hate hate hate school and i cannot wait until christmas break. of course i'm almost failing bio. fuck my life. all my other grades are fine but i just hate bio soooooo fucking much. i cant remember what happened in school other than that my speedball team is awesome haha. oh! and friday i stayed for the game and these black girls were like harrassing me and my friends and almost smashed in emilys windshield after the game. it was very scary. so after the game delaney and veronica came over and we just hung around and ate mcdonalds and didnt do anything really because cait got in trouble and had to go home. so i really hate my life right now and i don't think it's going to be getting any better. i just keep fucking myself over and making horrible decisions. i keep telling myself i'll do better but i don't. probly won't do anything tonight either. gen's having a party but i don't wanna go by myself. i went to the gym today so i feel a little better but i still can't help but feel so depressed all the time.

Current Music: brand new